Age of Ultron Movie Review

AHHHH TEARS. FEELS. SWISS CHEESE. Okay sorry but when I think of the latest Avengers movie, these are the first few words that pop into my head to describe how I feel. I am also listening to the AoU soundtrack and feeling pretty epic.

GIANT, GENERAL OVERVIEW: I loved it.

Now that THAT'S out of the way, on to a more in depth review:



The reason why I am a Marvelite {Marvel fangirl} is mainly because of the characters. Between the MCU characters and the casted actors/actresses, I fell in love with Marvel. The directors manage to perfectly embody the comic characters, (not like I know that much about the comic versions) and somehow every single movie I am reduced to a puddle of tears after all kinds of scenes: funny, heartbreaking, cringe-worthy, ect. I blame Marvel 100% for making me always fall in love with the villain. I mean seriously, as hard as they try to give us an evil, horrible, terrifying antagonist, they give too much room for me to find the good in each villain.

For example: The Winter Soldier
(I am in the boat that rocks Bucky isn't even a villain btw, but for this post's sake he is one)

THIS IS NOT THE FACE OF A VILLAIN. I REPEAT. This is the face of a confused little bubby who was twisted into a weapon WITHOUT HIS CONSENT. Sebastian Stan had only a few lines in the entire movie that was entitled after him, and yet he stole the hearts of millions of fangirls. Why? Because he acts with his eyes. (well there's about a zillion other reasons too but...)


MOVING RIGHT ALONG: Loki Laufeyson

DON'T CRY

s'okay loki...

yeah...this broken, lonely misunderstood prince is totally a villain (not). I mean sure, he did kill dozens of humans but AS THOR SAID HIMSELF:

Thank you. 

No but seriously, Thor was a twirp 50% of the time, Loki looses "his right" to the throne, Loki discovers he's the son of the frost giant king, Loki feels unloved and unable to get approval from Odin, he is manipulated by an alien race to attack earth, and he looses the only person who is able to convince Loki she loves him (Frigga). So yeah, if that was my life story I'd be pretty evil too. Oh and I am not undermining Loki's badness, he was an AMAZING villain, but I'm just sayin', he's not 100% e-v-i-l.

But Ultron is another story: I absolutely love Ultron because he is thoroughly evil.

FINALLY A SCARY VILLAIN

He isn't human; he was created with a tad too much of the "I shall make the earth burn into newborn perfection" persona. The sass of Ultron was brilliant and hilarious because as much as you're rooting for the Avengers and you really hate Ultron for enslaving the Maximoff twins, you gotta appreciate the raw humour of his supervillianess. Granted, the comedy probably came from Tony Stark's own personality.

same bro, same.

And he's so diddly darn clever! I mean, he takes on the entire sassvengers and holds his own!

"How could you be worthy? You're all killers. You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. There's only one path to peace...your extinction."

Okay so maybe that quote doesn't do justice to Ultron's greatness, but still *chills*

MOVING ON....
In general, the whole movie was quite comedic between Steve's "Language" comment and then the crap he got for it later, and the whole conversation about Mjölnir and how elevators are not "worthy."

*worried Thor*

*relieved derpy Thor*

I must say, there were quite a few curveballs I refuse to acknowledge to this day. For example: Brutasha.

Look at Jeremy. Now look at Chris. Perfect. 

I am sorry, but please no. Out of ALL of the avengers Nat could have ended up with, Bruce wasn't even on the list. Basically, my list consisted of Clint or Steve, but that's not the point. The point is, I didn't need to see some awkwardly thrown in romance between the fearless Black Widow and the giant, green...awkward...Hulk. I mean c'mon people. Sure they had a moment when Hulk was trying to bash Nat's brains out in the first Avengers movie, but other than that? Um WHAT!? It's not even that I don't ship it or that I find it "gross" (cuz I don't) it's just that I shipped Clintasha and RomanRogers 1000x harder than that. I never needed to see Bruce accidentally land and suffocate in the bosom of Natasha Romanoff. Ever. Going back to Clintasha, they were SO CANON... until they weren't.

Because OH YEAH Barton has a wife. AND CHILDREN. Woot woot! That's the sound of the Clintasha ship sinking into the depths of the ocean. Farewell sweet ship. I mean Laura is pretty cute with her giant preggo belly and her chill attitude with letting her husband go fight...Seriously that's one tough woman, letting Clint be an avenger....

UGH *can't find the tumblr post where Jeremy is sassily saying "there are 1000 robots, and I killed 11 of them." #keepin' it real bro*

BUT YEAH I love Clint's farm, his wife is great, and thank the lord he didn't die!

"...and I have a bow and arrow..."

WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY EMOTIONAL DEMISE: Quicksilver's death

My goodness. Just like with James Buchanan Barnes, I fell hard and fast for a character that had hardly any lines, and of course, he doesn't survive the brutality of Joss Whedon. *quick moment of praise to our lord and savior, Joss, but also HOW COULD YOU*

Pietro Maximoff: played by my love, Aaron Taylor Johnson.

greatest moment ever.

I'm just going to take a moment and slow clap for whoever helped pull together the Maximoff twins in AoU. Because between their PLATONIC chemistry, wicked accents, and cool outfits+superpowers, they are my favorite Marvel siblings. (sorry Thor and Loki) ATJ and Lizzie Olsen already have the advantage of filming Godzilla together, but this movie was just so heart-meltingly CUTE for them because Pietro was the best older brother. Ever.

MERP. So brotherly and protective the entire movie. (oh enjoy Clint's face)

again with the eye acting

So when Quicksilver died...the emotional walls that were barely holding back a hurricane of feels started to crumble, and then Wanda's reaction BROKE ME.

STOP. NO. 

nuuuuu

See that quivering little bunny off into the distance? Yep, that's me. 

My reaction to Pietro's death wasn't much better.

oops... what have I brought upon us?!

thank you Sebastian, for illustrating how I feel.

Because little Pietro became swiss cheese...

...riddled with dozens of bullets...

...and whatever was left of my heart is now gone.

 IN THE END: Bravo Marvel for producing a bloomin' awesome film. I am greating looking forward to Infinity War, and I hesitantly say I am excited for Civil War...(but not really because STEVE)

BUT YES: I loved the new characters in AoU. Ultron: Check. Maximoff Twins: Check.

VISION:

#pure sass

Check. He is SO SUPER rad and ACK the fact that he is the actor of Jarvis makes him 100x cooler. Looking forward to some future VisionxWanda ;)


To end on a pleasant note, have some classic Marvel male objectification:

-The Padawan

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